primary

It's been a really long time since I've had a primary. Actually, it's been since Ella Christine, back in the summer of 2008, right before I moved back to MI.

I wasn't going to take "I" on as a primary. His parents were a little too much for me. They are young. They are like a lot of parents in that they don't fully grasp the fact that their infant is in an ICU. I=Intensive, but many parents forget that fact. I can understand it to a point- no one ever wants their baby in an ICU. And I understand blocking out the ugly parts of life. Still, we educate parents on good and bad stimulation for their babies and these two just didn't seem to be getting it. After the first two days of having "I", I told my roommate (who was to be in the same nursery as myself for the 3 day stretch) that I loved little "I", and would love to primary him, but I didn't think I could handle the parents.

"I" had had surgery three days prior to this. On my first day of having him, we turned off his IV pain meds and extubated him. He did fantastically, but was obviously in a lot of pain, was hungry, and we couldn't hold him.

On the third day, his parents came him and were getting better at not overstimulating him. I was assessing him and he was laying there calmly while I did so. The parents remarked at how well he did when I was here. They didn't like the other nurses that had had him, they ignored him while he cried (per parents), and he just did so well with me. They told me I was his favorite nurse and they really liked it when I had him. I bonded with them as I assisted them in checking his temperature and changing his diaper for the first time. I signed up, later that day, to be his primary.

A few days later, I had him again. Mom came in and was happy to see I was there. A family member came with and while she was holding, Mom talked to the family member saying that "Ashley is his favorite nurse, he does so well when she's here".

This is why I do my job. This is what makes me happy, gives me a purpose in life. I know why God has put me here, it's to make the worst moments in a new mother's life, easier, better, smoother.